It’s interesting, isn’t it? We talk about scaling businesses, processes, structures, but we rarely talk about the deeply uncomfortable process of scaling ourselves.
I often think that we aren’t too different from a start-up really; we are always learning, adapting, and growing, and life often demands change from us, and mostly before we feel ready. Whether that’s going through a redundancy, becoming a parent, starting a business, moving, travelling, loss, the list is endless.
If you think of a small start-up, we may enjoy those early days, being the person who wears all the hats, being scrappy, speaking with everyone 1:1, and getting things done quickly, and then before we know it, 6 months later there is a team of 20 people with very distinct roles and a process in place that forces us to change. Life isn’t too dissimilar.
We can get used to (and enjoy) who we are and how we operate. We can enjoy having time and space to give freely; we can enjoy the characters in our lives, but then over time, life asks us to change. We can find that what once worked for us is no longer viable or sustainable, and that our internal capacity is being stretched.
Accepting change
In business, while still hard, we accept that change needs to happen because the business has grown, so how we work also needs to change. Whether that’s how we spend our time, how we prioritise, or how we communicate, because ultimately we know that if we don’t change, the business will break or crumble. But why do we often struggle with that same level of acceptance when it comes to scaling ourselves?
Why do we find it so hard to upgrade who we are and how we operate? Is it the uncertainty of who or what we will need to say goodbye to in the process? it the grief of letting go of parts of ourselves that we once held dear? Is it the fear of the unknown and who we will become on the other side, or a combination of all these things?
“What got you here won’t get you there”
We’ve all heard the saying as it relates to business, but I’ve often thought that it’s also true for us as individuals. As we grow, the person we are becoming, and the vehicles and ways in which we operate, must evolve too. What once used to feel fine or even ‘good’ for us can end up leaving us feeling uninspired, depleted, drained, or just no longer viable/sustainable in this next chapter.
In scaling businesses, processes, and systems break continually, and in that case, we accept it. We need to pivot. We need to adapt for growth to happen. But often we don’t apply that same knowing individually.
If you think about it, our individual growth is just about building our capacity to hold more (whatever that means to you). For me it’s about impacting more lives, and in order to do that I must be able to hold more responsibility and visibility. For you, it could be to grow your business, expand your family, undergo a career pivot, or simply embody more happiness and contentment in your everyday.
No matter our individual growth goals, when we feel that life is asking us to make change, it can feel challenging, because we’re often confronted by the realisation that we can’t become who we want to be by remaining who we were. It’s a bit like trying to upload the newest app onto outdated IOS software; without refreshing the operating system, it’s not compatible and will crash the device.
Building our internal capacity
When we are scaling ourselves, we are forced to upgrade internally so that we can hold what’s coming externally. That could mean confronting outdated beliefs, habits, actions, or environments.
But much like in business, we often tend to operate under the assumption “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” In life, we tend not to move, fix, or upgrade something until it becomes a problem. Many of us don’t move proactively; we may see the problem coming down the track, but very few of us move because we want to, but instead because we have to.
While change comes with grief, the reframe that helps me is that we aren’t changing who we are; we’re stepping into who we were always meant to become.
The process of becoming
Recognising that our growth won’t always feel good or comfortable and that we may miss parts of our older selves is part of the process. We can always look back fondly and be grateful for every person, experience, lesson, and version of ourselves, because without them there would be no us.
Much like a scaling startup, while new systems, processes, and ways of being may feel odd, strange, or uncomfortable at first, just like every stage and step before, over time it just becomes the norm until our next ceiling arrives and things ask to change again.
Human growth and business growth are intrinsically linked, and learning to enjoy every step and stage is key. Scaling ourselves can often feel like the hardest work of all, but ultimately, the most rewarding and fulfilling.
If it feels like your internal processes are breaking right now, what if instead of being broken down, you were being rebuilt, refined, and ready to hold what’s coming next? Not all chapters of growth may feel good, but they are necessary to meet the version of ourselves that we were always meant to become.
If this resonated or sparked something in you, here are ways you can hear more from me or explore working together:
- Follow me, Natalie Neilson, on Instagram/TikTok/LinkedIn/Substack/YouTube
- Tune into my podcast, The Power of You, Available on Apple/Spotify Podcasts.
- Enquire about my speaker sessions/faciliated growth experiences helping leaders and teams navigate growth and stay clear, effective, and resilient during periods of change: https://natalieneilson.com/speaking/
- Book a 1:1 growth session @ https://natalieneilson.com/
- Explore coaching approaches at scale for your teams and organisation through TTM Coaching. https://ttmcoaching.com/
Or DM/Email me for more info: nataliej@ttmcoaching.com